Title： The Moon, Us, and the Albums
Author： Marni
I look through the viewfinder.
I can see the backs of the two brothers running across the grassy park, occasionally glancing back with innocent smiles.
The refreshing sky, the interwoven light, the gentle sunlight filtering through the trees, the sparkling water surface.
The wind that carries the fragrance of flowers and grasses makes me feel the breath of the earth and trees.
The whispers of the trees and the songs of the small birds are comforting.
Before my eyes, my boys are embraced by this life-circulating world.
An ordinary moment. A precious moment of now.
The boys suddenly stop.
They are watching a child and his father playing catch on the same grass.
As a single parent, I call out to them in a deliberately cheerful voice and throw the ball with all my strength, putting in twice the love.
Until just recently, after picking up my sons from elementary school and daycare, the three of us would head home together. Holding hands, we often sang the song "Over the Rainbow".
At night, we would get into bed and read picture books, and then in the cozy warmth of the bedding, I would hum an original lullaby.
Now, both my sons have started elementary school this spring.
" Beyond the Rainbow" has become the energetic "I'm home!" from my boys and my "Welcome back."
Before storytime, the boys are already fast asleep. To their adorable sleeping faces, I whisper again tonight, "Thank you for being born into this world."
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Looking back, a few years ago, I carried a lot of anxiety and insecurity.
There were moments when I wished this moment could last forever, feeling the comforting breath and weight of my sons in my arms. I even thought, "If only the Earth could vanish in a puff..."
Throughout such circumstances, the collective effort of the three of us somehow managing together as a trio gradually became a source of trust, both in myself and in my sons.
Beside their sleeping faces, as they live each day to the fullest, my heart swells with the wish 'May this Earth be forever rich in nature and overflowing with love'.
Until a few years ago, there were times when I felt like the gently shining moon in the sky understood everything about me, and on the quiet nights when my sons were asleep, I would sometimes speak to the moon alone.
I used to look up at the endless starry sky and feel encouraged by realizing that my worries and insecurities were insignificant compared to its vastness.
Before I knew it, at the dinner table with my sons, who were gradually becoming more independent, conversations grew richer. Before bedtime, we gaze at the beautiful moon together. It's just small steps, but I notice that we are moving forward at our own pace.
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In the cherry blossom season nine years ago, I was entrusted with the life of my eldest son, who looked at the world with serene and clear eyes, and six years ago, in the same season of cherry blossoms, I embraced the life of my second son, who enveloped the world with warm and gentle hands.
This spring marks five years of our life together as a family of three. Through my camera's viewfinder, I see my sons welcomed by the world, bathed in the pure light under the cherry blossom trees.
Just as I gaze at my sons, they also look at me, and at each other.
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I remember the words from a certain picture book.
"What's important is that you're illuminated and you're illuminating."
I want us to be gently connected, sharing our light and understanding, just like how the world revolves.
I want to be that kind of person, connected and shining our lights together as my sons look at me.
In the usual park.
In the usual scenes.
Lately, my sons have been joyfully playing dodgeball with friends.The path they have walked hand in hand with me, and the path they will create with their friends from now on.
I stand between these two loosely connected paths, and from there, I gaze through my viewfinder once again.
Here, there are my sons, radiating happiness with their whole being, and there is me, feeling our happiness and gratitude to the fullest. Countless moments reflect unspoken gazes.
To capture each of these moments, we preserve them in photographs and memories, continuing to write another page in our daily lives, as proof that we live in a world filled with color and peace.
As my sons begin to tread new paths, I hope these photos and memories will become albums warmly welcoming them back, saying 'welcome home'.
Call for Donations
Thank you for reading this essay to the end. This essay was written by Single Mother Marni for Mother's Day2024. The non-profit organization Single Mothers Sisterhood supports the self-care of single mothers' minds and bodies. Your generous donations will be carefully used to fund the operation of 'Self-Care Workshops for Single Mothers' and 'Expressive Recovery Programs'. The well-being of single mothers is essential, not only for themselves but also for their children. Your support would mean a lot to us. Donations are accepted here.
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